Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Why You're Not Married

Last week a friend sent me an article entitled, “Why You’re Not Married”. To be honest, I wouldn’t exactly call the sender “friend”. Rather, he is a pompous ass I went out with a few times who thinks he knows everything. I would like to believe that Anton means well and that his problem-solving skills simply lack compassion and discernment. However, my intuition (which I am finally learning to trust) tells me that he gets off on having all of the answers and explaining life to naïve young ladies like me.

In a noble attempt not to throw the baby out with the bath water, I decided to at least read the article. Side note: “Throw the baby out with the bath water”?? What a disturbing image! Has anyone "thrown out bathwater" since 1937? Why do we even still use that expression anymore? Sometimes my cousin, Josh, and I play this game where we try to see how many obnoxious idioms/expressions we can use in one conversation. He doubled my score on the SATS which means he always wins at this game.

Before we get to the article, a quick word on etiquette: I know etiquette has gone the way of floppy discs, but I need to make two quick etiquette recommendations: #1 – if you are a guy, do not forward this article to a woman. I know you will read it and think of 20 girls you want to share it with, but don’t. Just don’t. Unless, of course, you want to give them a reason to hate you. #2 – if you are a woman, don’t send this article to other random women. Only send it to the really close friends – you know, the ones who can handle your PMS and don’t judge you for watching Vampire Diaries.

On to the article…

I think Tracy McMillan did an awesome job with this article. She tackled a few issues that we might otherwise gloss over (hello, I’m selfish!). Her writing was clever and she even snuck in a word I had to look up on… any guesses?

I’d love to hear what you guys think! Comment away!


  1. I LOOOVE this article!

    I'm a Bitch and I know it. I have lots of anger, and the men I share an office with tell me I'm bitter toward men...and I don't disagree with it one bit. At least now I know that is why I am not married! :)

    Also, apparently I am shallow since I want a man who is TALL. I can't help it that I am 6'1! Somebody should have poured some growth hormone in the water back in 1985 and I wouldnt have a problem today.

  2. here's what i had to look up: naso-labial folds. and i'm so glad it had nothing to do with labias.

    the article was okay. i guess i haven't tried to date you so i don't see any of those things in you. i think you're sweet and funny and perfect and i too wonder why? but part of my problem with sacrificing is that marriage is so effing hard that i guess you have to be really sure you want to sacrifice part of your desire for a man to act like a man and not a 13 year old boy. but maybe that's just selfish of me?