- I don't have to look good for anyone on Christmas morning... I can open presents without a bra or makeup on. (this is also a plus to having micro boobs, they aren't going anywhere) woot. I mean, theoretically, I could still do this with a boyfriend but I would like to keep up airs of being classy... until at least Valentine's day.
- I save a few hundred bucks by not having to buy a special present. Seriously, since my relationships are short lived train wrecks, I don't even know how to go about giving things to the significant other population appropriate for wrapping and placing under a tree. I am too chubby to fulfill anyone's "sexy" fantasy so a certificate for something sexually related is out and I am sure any 30 year old man already has a watch and/or cologne... phew, pressure is off for another year!
- I don't have to suffer through someone else's awkward holiday, church and/or present routine. I mean, holidays with your own family are odd enough, let's not throw a pervy uncle, small children or a traditional Catholic service into the mix. Another bonus is no office parties!
- You can make out with whoever you want on New Years Eve! (or not find anyone to kiss and feel like a horrible loser). We'll see how this pans out this year.